OK, we’re going there: Just how turned on were you by 50 Shades of Grey? Next question: Now that submissive is sexy (and officially out of hiding under the covers for good), do you want some of that? If you do, there’s no reason you can’t create it–right in your own bedroom.
According to sexologist Jaiya, author of the new bookCuffed, Tied and Satisfied, the fact that many women get turned on by the thought of surrendering to pleasure is not exactly news. What we want to know, though, is what’s the best way to spice up your love life? Sure, you can take some sexy pics of each other. But how about playing some kinky games? The best ones create a safe space to play to your edges because they contain the Passion Trifecta: Mystery, Obstacle and a little bit of Naughtiness!
Not quite sure where your edges are exactly but think you may be ready to explore them? Never mind the fact that the sheets have been kinda cold lately.Get cozy with your lover and read on together.
First step is to set up the rules, and make sure that everyone is clear on them before you play.
Examples:
- You cannot speak unless you ask permission to
- If you need to stop the session and check in, say Yellow
- You cannot look at me, but you must keep your eyes open at all time
- You cannot touch me
- You cannot move
Next, set up the rewards and punishments.
Rewards
- A Sexual Favor
- A Massage
- A Gift
Punishments
- Being Ignored
- Spankings
- Having to stand in the corner facing the wall
- Game is over
GAME 1: PRETTY POSES
1. Dress in something that makes you feel sexy and you know will also please him.
2. Let your partner pose you on a couch or bed as if he is a photographer looking for the most arousing and provocative pose. It is best if you are not allowed to speak and you cannot make eye contact.
3. As he poses you, he will point out what is sexiest and what pleases him the most. He will observe you.
4. If you break a rule, he must punish you immediately. If you do a good job and please him, await your reward.
GAME 2: RED LIGHT/GREEN LIGHT
1. The person in control will say Green Light when they want to be touched. Then they will begin to count down “20, 19, 18, 17….” Once they reach zero, the person touching must stop, or take a punishment.
2. The person touching will be able to touch the person counting in any way they desire. The objective is to get them to forget to count, thus prolonging the experience.
Game Tip: Don’t just use your hands. Use your whole body to touch your lover. This works to help you both win!
GAME 3: MASTER SAYS
1. Your lover is your Master and you must do what he says (unless of course you call Yellow). However, if he doesn’t say Master Says before an order and you do what he said then you get a punishment at the end of the game.
2. Here are few orders:
- Very slowly strip off a piece of clothing
- Come over here and rub my feet
- Tell me something you love about me
- Take off your panties
- Touch your body
GAME 4: GUESS THAT OBJECT
1. Place a blindfold over your eyes.
2. You will have to guess what the object is that he is touching you with. Is it a feather, a fruit, a fork? If you guess correctly you get a reward, if you guess wrong you get a punishment at the end of the game.
Game Tip: Go for 5-10 different guesses. This provides a nice opportunity for lots of rewards and punishments.
GAME 5: A or B
1. Put on the blindfold and lie down on the bed either nude or in lingerie.
2. The person in control will let a sensory item touch you with a long slow stroke and say This is A and then touch you with a contrasting stroke and sayThis is B and then ask which you prefer. You answer, A or B. Your lover can test different areas on your body, different kinds of touch, and different sensory objects (a fork or a piece of furry fabric).
3. End the game by appreciating your lover for taking the time to discover more about your pleasure.
Game Tip: Play this game for hours so it will culminate in some hot steamy fun!
Jaiya is an award-winning sexologist and author of Cuffed, Tied and Satisfied. She is on a mission to help men, women and couples create lasting passion and unleash sexual ecstasy.
SOURCE: BRAZENWOMAN
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